Shan's Journal... 🖉

Ada kalanya hati kita dipenuhi oleh berbagai macam perasaan. Ada kalanya hati kita hampa tanpa teriakan. Dalam keadaan apapun, ada hal-hal yang aku lakukan tanpa bosan. Bahkan hal-hal kecil itulah yang mampu menstabilkan emosiku yang berkecamuk, atau bahkan saat aku merasa there's is nothing left of me♫ source ➊ music-makes-nanana Hal yang paling mudah dilakukan tanpa perlu menguras energi adalah mendengarkan musik♫ . Mendengarkan musik dapat dilakukan bahkan dengan keadaan seperti tertidur. Kita tidak perlu bergerak, membuka mata, bahkan berfikir.  And the various of songs that I listen to is Taylor Swift's. I loved her songs, She sings every song that every girl wants to sing. Dan selain itu, musik yang aku dengarkan adalah instrumental musik-musik klasik, juga soundtrack dari film atau anime yang kutonton. ➋ Carpe diem! Selain mendengarkan musik, biasanya aku menonton , seperti yang kusebutkan diatas. Dengan rutinitas harianku yang lumayan padat...

Aku haru sendiri menulis post kali ini Cukup kelam untuk mengawali bulan ini. Ini tidak pernah terpikir olehku sebelumnya, Ini tersirat begitu saja, Ini bukanlah hayalanku semata, Ini hanyalah sepucuk teriakan yang tak sanggup kulakukan Ini nyata walau memang terlihat seperti fiksi. Perkenalkan, dia temanku. Teman yang kupikir kukenal dengan baik Teman yang kupikir mengenalku dengan baik Teman yang sudah bertahun-tahun kukenal. Teman yang sebelumnya selalu memberi senyuman hangat. Tak kusangka ia sekejam ini. Memberi harapan yang menyiksa Mengapa tidak segari dahulu? Mengapa baru saat ini? Sengaja kah ia, begitu ingin aku jatuh? Lalu aku harus apa... Harus kah aku berpura tegar? Berpura menjadi kuat, Membangun benteng rapuh yang terlihat kokoh? Aku tahu, tidak mungkin. Betapa curang dirinya. Dia mengenalku dengan baik, Jelas dia mengetahui baik kelemahanku. Tapi aku hanya sedikit mengetahui rahasianya. Membuatku selalu ingin ...

Hōtarō Oreki    Kanji 折木 奉太郎    Romanji Oreki Hōtarō Characteristics    Age 16-17    Gender Male    Height 176 cm (5'9")    Weight 62 kg (137 lbs) Personal Status    Occupation Student    Clubs Classics Member    Relatives §   Unnamed Father §   Tomoe Oreki  (Sister) First appearance    Manga Debut Chapter 1    Anime Debut Episode 1 Voice Actors    Japanese Yuichi Nakamura    English {{{english seiyu}}} (source : link ) Based on Wikipedia: The main protagonist of Hyōka, he is a rational boy who lives by "If I don't have to do something, I won't, but if I have to, I'll do it quickly." He only joi...

Selamat ulang tahun katanya... Selamat berkurang  usia juga... Aku menghela nafas yang sangaaat panjang. Akhirnya aku melewati masa-masa fifteen . Maksudku, lagu Fifteen-nya Taylor Swift benar-benar aku mengerti isinya sekarang ini. Well... count to ten, take it in. This is life before you know who you gonna be. I did know it at fifteen. Aku benar-benar mengerti atas segala sesuatu yang sudah ku alami selama satu tahun terakhir ini. Banyak sekali. Sangat. Maksudku... jelas, aku masuk SMA, dan aku benar-benar mengalami hampir semua hal-hal yang tersurat dalam lirik lagu itu. Dan yang tersirat. 15 sangat luar biasa. Aku merasakan banyak hal. Aku menemukan banyak hal. Aku belajar banyak hal. Aku mengerti banyak hal. I become the better me. Dan 16 ini... Semoga lebih banyak lagi yang kurasakan. Lebih banyak lagi yang kutemukan. Lebih banyak lagi yang kupelajari. Dan lebih banyak lagi yang kumengerti. Hari ini pun, Aku belajar hal baru. Iti...

Have you ever feel like frustrated? Frustrated with your school-life. Frustrated with your house-life. Frustrated with your love-life.  every particular things in your life. Yeah, I can’t write about love-life it. Why? I just can’t. I’m already give up on that. I’m afraid to fall again. I don’t wanna make a conversation with any boy. Boys are like something I don’t want to know. Gorgeous but dangerous. Fantastic but pathetic. Adorable but miserable. I mean, they can change your life. Change your way of thinking only with their smiles, only with they send you sweet messages every night. So, I have decided to block everything about creatures called boys. Go back to the topic about frustrated. I write this post, because I’m frustrated right now last night. You know? I’m attend an accelerated program in my school. And that makes me to try harder to graduated with good(great. -My dad) mark. Only in two years. Could you imagine that? I got much much p...

whoa. what have I done today? whoa. I couldn't remember. wait, today was the first day of my final exam in this semester. and the schedule for today was chemistry. yeah. FYI. I'm really bad at chemistry . I didn't know why, every time I tried to learn it, somewhat It wouldn't understood by me. haha. forget it. So...? Well that's kinda absurd. I'm just somewhat frustrated with my final test. Chemistry is so so unpredictable. I mean, It's mean. You know, mean. Yeah, really mean. (link source : link ) "And now I try hard to make it I just wanna make you proud I'm never gonna be good enough for you Can't pretend that I'm alright And you can't change me . . I'm sorry I can't be perfect" -Simple Plan - Perfect- -Sie.

H-15. Yeah, final test in this semester will arrived.  That’s kinda frustrating. I just finished my midtest about 1 week ago. Too much to do, Too much to tasks, And too less time. You know, it’s killing me inside. Yeah, plus the distance between my house and my school is about 50 km. Cruel, isn’t it? I’m too tiny, too fragile, too exhausted, to face this. Well yeah, it’s me and my self. But My Papa said  “ This all is your choice, you have to this .” You know, when I heard that, somewhat I get angry.  Why not? I’m in acceleration program in my school beacuse my papa wants that. And because of that program, my parents forbid me to join student council.   “ You have to focus with your program, is that clear? ” .  Yeah it still remember my papa said that. And so, I’m not free anymore in my extracurricular, “Broadcasting Club”.  Just because I’m in 3rd semester,  I can’t do whatever I want .   Broadcasting ...